Truth First

Without guidance, people fall, but with many counselors there is deliverance. - Proverbs 11:14

One of the "jobs" of a pastor is to provide biblical pastoral counseling in a context of general care and feeding of the local flock. Most pastors consider the counseling they give to be "biblical," because they work very hard to separate their personal opinion from God's objective truth, no matter the situation. While they certainly aren't always successful in these endeavors, most pastors do try.

Having said all that, as a pastor, I was often surprised by those who (after hearing God's clear instruction on their situation) went on to pursue a rebellious path, usually to their own harm or peril. From these experiences I learned that mere words will never be enough. Godly counsel must be backed up by prayer, the encouragement of God's people, and God's own powerful providential influence, before true change can occur.

And even then, no repentance still means no change. God's truth must be delivered, acknowledged, accepted, and then acted upon for transformation to occur, but it begins with truth.

Of all acts of man repentance is the most divine. The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none. - Thomas Carlyle